NYC Comic-Con PART 4

Well Comic-Con was over, but I didn't leave empty -handed! In terms of cool free stuff, there wasn't as much as you'd find in San Diego. I did get a Meg Ryan mask:

Or maybe it was a Skrull. I can never tell.

I also got a Hellboy 2 poster, supposedly one of only 2,008 being given out, but I seriously doubt that anyone really counted out 2,008 posters to bring to Con. If they did, that must be the most boring job ever. What's that craigslist posting going to look like?

INTERNSHIP: Come work in the movie business and rub elbows with the stars! Duties will include counting out 2,008 posters and loading them onto a truck. Must be able to count. Unpaid.

But I digress.

Most of the places on the floor at Con look sort of like this:

Where you can buy hard-to-find collectibles at rock-bottom prices!

Pay no attention to that.

I was good this year, I didn't get a ton of stuff like a normally do, which requires me to make a special visit to the Home Depot parking lot to hire some immigrants to haul it home for me. Mostly because I already have pretty much everything, action-figure wise. Nevertheless, I did come away with a few bags worth:This only required two immigrant workers to get home.

Here's the run down:

One (1) Batman T-shirt

Two (2) DC SHOWCASE collections (Superman and Batman), which are basically a romp through the absurdity of 1960's Superman and Batman comics. Always a good time.

Three (3) Batman action figures, varying styles.

Three (3) Masters of the Universe "Snake Men" action figures, which I've been looking for since 2003.

One (1) autographed "trinity" print by GW Fisher. Nice guy.

So there you have it. The Batman figures went straight to my display of Batmen from every style I can find. It's quite a party once you get them all standing together. Here's what it looks like (click to embiggen):

That's a lot of guano.

The He-Man figs are going under my bed until the day when I can get my Castle Grayskull out of storage and give them a properly displayed home. The trinity print is going on my wall, here's a better look at it:


Wonder Woman looks pissed. Probably because Con was charging $3.75 for a bottle of soda.

And besides that, all I have are my memories, my photos, my empty wallet, and the lingering stench of geek-scent in my hair to remember Con by. But have no fear, true believers, because San Diego is just around the corner. And this year I'll actually be sleeping on a bed! Woo hoo!

But don't let that scare you off, keep checking the blog for exciting updates in the world of VforVitale.com. There's some cool stuff coming up, stuff you'll want to wake your kids up for. And there may even be a very special appearance by the guy who played "Mr. Six" in the old Six Flags commercials! So don't be a stranger...

Middle-aged Black Manta commands you!

NYC Comic-Con PART 3

Here it is, part 3!

Sunday was Kids day, so there were lots of little nerdlings running around. This one was one of my favorites:

After a while the Stormtroopers rallied and started rounding up the kids:Word is that they lined them up and shot them behind the convention center. Kind of like the RNC.

Basically the point of Sunday is to wander aimlessly and try to soak in all the stuff you missed the last 2 days. Meryl found this thing:
It stole her wallet.

And I found this thing:
Not sure what it is, but it made me crave Ice Tea. (*Editor's Note: If you want to understand this hilarious joke and be the envy of all your friends, tune in to TOP SECRET next week for the thrilling conclusion!)

Here's some Batman action figures:

Blue, Black...










...and Bale









Then the Con folk went and flickered the lights, which is the universal demand to get the hell out. And the stampede began!

RUN!!!

This is me and Meryl showing our sad faces, because Con was over:
Yes I know that it appears I'm about to spit out some rancid Sunny D, but that's what my frown looks like. Shut up.

Here's a picture of all the sad geeks outside, many of them calling their moms to come pick them up:
But wait!

What about all the cool stuff I bought? I did buy cool stuff, didn't I?

Yes of course I did! But you'll have to come back tomorrow to find out what. That, and random pics that didn't make it into parts 1 through 3. Plus a very special message from the guy who played Maude's husband on Maude, Bill Macy! You're not gonna want to miss this!Confused Stripper Wonder Woman with a lightsaber commands you!!

NYC Comic-Con PART 2

Welcome to Part II of VforVitale's thrilling exploration into the NYC Comic-Con. Yesterday we looked at toys and some ugly women, and today we're going to look at more toys, some panels, and ugly men! But first things first. As I mentioned yesterday, the first day of Con was also my birthday. And though by day's end I was exhausted (I also worked that day, mind you. Which necessitated getting up rather early), I still managed to party my ass off thanks to the party-planning efforts of Meryl. Here's knee-crushing proof:


All right back to the Con. Saturday was Panel day, I got to see a lot of cool panels and took a lot of crappy pictures that pretty much all look like this:


So, yeah. Ron Perlman, Doug Jones, Selma Blair and Guillermo Del Toro are in the above picture from the Hellboy 2 panel, but you can't tell because of the crappy lighting and my inability to focus. Other people in the photo are Barack Obama, Suri Cruise, Crispin Glover and the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man, but you can't see them either. It was quite a panel.

This is from The Spirit panel. That's Eva Mendez and Frank Miller. Eva Mendez was drunk. Frank Miller was Frank Miller.

There was a Hulk panel too, but they didn't allow any pictures for that. So afterwards I went and got a picture with him on the floor.

Hulk is actually a cool guy. He signed my chest and tried to get me to come to his stand-up act in Erie next month. I told him I had a wedding to go to (which was a lie). He looked disappointed.

This is Meryl trying to upstage me:

Pfffffft.

The last few panels covered Speed Racer and Dark Knight, but sadly no Watchmen. I did manage to see the next best thing, though, which was this:

Yup, that's Heath Ledger's Joker mixing it up with Michael Keaton's Batman. One of them's dead and the one's career is. What a country!

But back to Watchmen, they did have some toys:Awesome.

Some guy started yelling into a microphone and people started clamoring to catch whatever it was he was throwing at them:
Turns out it was Hepatitis C. Good times.

This guy isn't a cardboard cut-out:
He tried to get me to come to his stand-up act in Erie next month. I told him I was having a hip replaced.

This is what black-suit Spider-Man would look like if he gained 40 lbs and wore a fanny-pack:

There's enough of him to go around, ladies.

I had to take a picture of this guy because he was stupid enough to buy a statue half as big as he was and then realize he had to drag it around with him for the rest of the day.

Looking back, I wish I'd followed him around some more because I'd love to see this guy get home on the subway with that thing.

This is me standing next to a statue of what I would look like if I took my glasses off:

I'm a bit more ripped, but overall I think it was a decent likeness.

Ooh here we go. Ok a bit of a backstory on this one. I bought this same exact Iron Man statue 2 years ago for $250. Guess what I found it selling for at Con:
$1,300. Awesome.

That about wraps up Part 2 of my Con spectacular, check back tomorrow for Part 3! There may even be a special appearance by a very special guest! Or...there may not. Guess you'll just have to come back and see.
Burger King Stormtrooper commands you!!

NYC Comic-Con 2008 PART 1

Whew, that was an exhausting weekend. I spent it braving the geek masses to buy action figures, seeing top-secret movie footage before anyone else so I could brag about it and feel superior, and trying not to get cut by all the ridiculously large-ass swords that the anime geeks feel compelled to bring with them everywhere. Welcome to Comic-Con.

So here's how it's going to go. I took a lot of pictures this past weekend of a lot of stuff (Click on any of them to make them huge). So I'm going to try to post them here and make snarky comments in order to build my blog-cred. So please, follow me on a visual journey of the East Coast's largest gathering of basement-dwelling virgins.


Oh yeah, not only was the 18th the start of Con, but it was also my birthday (let's just say I turned 19). Meryl got me a kick-ass Batman statue, possibly in an attempt to quench my desire for Batman collectibles. If she only knew.







Here's the entrance to the Con. I have no idea what "Ben-10" is, but apparently it's important enough to have earned a place on the entrance banner. This will not mark the last time I am confronted with something that I cannot identify. Oh no.





Okay, now for what we all came for - toys!







Here's some Hellboy 2 stuff. You'll notice that Hellboy is smoking a cigar. You know, for the kids. Also, this movie is called Hellboy 2. For the kids.






Iron Man! Hasbro continues the time-honored and mind-boggingly stupid tradition of releasing 10 versions of the same character but with wacky paint jobs. That guy on the left is "Captain America Armor Iron Man." Really? So Iron Man is trying to, what, disguise himself as Captain America to get the military discount at the barber shop? Personally I'd think about taking the iron suit off but what do I know, I'm not an alcoholic billionaire.




Here's Iron Man's car. Yeah that's right, Iron Man drives around in a car. With his name on it. Lord knows that even though he can go faster than the speed of sound with his rocket-boots, when Iron Man needs to go to the drugstore to buy toothpaste nothing beats a Ford!

I painted JOE on the side of my car one summer. You know, so people would know that I was Joe. It was an uneventful time in my life.







Hey look, Hulk toys! That look exactly like the Hulk toys from the 2003 movie! But let's all just forget about that ...







...because here's some MORE Hulk toys! That don't have anything to do with either movie! But they'll be on shelves at the same time! So go see the movie, buy the toys, then forget about the movie and the toys you just bought and go out and buy some MORE toys that have nothing to do with the movie! Even though it's the same character! Yay capitalism!





These are apparently costumes worn by members of some Japanese boy band called "Abingdon Boys School." I have no idea what they were doing there. Nor do I have any idea why Japanese boy bands like to dress up like gay Scottish pirates.

The real reason I decided to take a picture of this was because it was so...small. Japanese people are, well, tiny. To give you an idea of just how tiny, this entire display to the left was in a display box being carried around the floor by Gary Coleman.









Here's some guy drawing something on the floor.








And here's that same guy 24 hours later. I believe that's Captain America, looking very pissed off because he just got his Amex statement and somebody has been charging Turtle Wax to his card. I'm looking at you, Captain-America-Armor-Iron-Man.














This thing stole my wallet.








Here's Meryl, looking rather fetching as Bill Plympton writes a song about her in the background. It goes on for 20 minutes and is interrupted 3 times by a bear showing a hamburger the best way to commit suicide.








It wouldn't be a Con without the geeks who express their individuality by dressing up as Stormtroopers.








Hey look! Batman movie toys that don't completely suck!










Um, nevermind.





Ah, this is where the fun begins.





This is Wonder Woman. If she lived in a trailer park and had Type II Diabetes.











This is Princess Leia. If she were played by a cross between Kate Bosworth and a microphone stand.











This is Princess Leia if she wandered into a funhouse and decided that she could totally pull off the bikini after looking at herself in one of the skinny mirrors.












This is Princess Leia if she joined a sorority freshmen year but held onto that freshmen-15 until graduation.










This is Rainbow-Brite if she grew up and became a Japanese prostitute. Really though, was there ever any other career path for her?








This is Gwen Stacy if her brother somehow convinced her to dress up like a go go dancer and come with him to Comic-Con so he could pretend she was his girlfriend. I actually talked to this one. She had no idea what was going on.








This is Zatanna and Power Girl if they just stopped giving a crap and started hanging out at lesbian bars.








That'll do it for this edition, but be sure to come back tomorrow. There's lots, LOTS more to go over. I don't know how many parts this recap will end up being, but figure somewhere between 3 to 158. Part 2 starts tomorrow!